True, I have been drinking and smoking more than is healthy, but I’ve been clean for 48 hours and am feeling better than I have in 48 days. Or about that long anyway.
Suggestion: Make three lists…
List One: Time Wasters
List Two: Money Wasters
List Three: Health Wasters
See what items show up on all three lists and then, eliminate them…
I just cannot stand the mask and hose tonight! I am going solo…
I ran across this great diagram this morning and thought I’d share it:
The sky is dark and the hills are white
As the storm-king speeds from the north to-night,
And this is the song the storm-king sings,
As over the world his cloak he flings:
“Sleep, sleep, little one, sleep;”
He rustles his wings and gruffly sings:
“Sleep, little one, sleep.”
On yonder mountain-side a vine
Clings at the foot of a mother pine;
The tree bends over the trembling thing,
And only the vine can hear her sing:
“Sleep, sleep, little one, sleep;
What shall you fear when I am here?
Sleep, little one, sleep.”
The king may sing in his bitter flight,
The tree may croon to the vine to-night,
But the little snowflake at my breast
Liketh the song I sing the best,–
Sleep, sleep, little one, sleep;
Weary thou art, anext my heart
Sleep, little one, sleep.
Eugene Field
Just another morning feeling too tired to think, but I have to deliver storyboards today, so I have to push through with more coffee than is healthy…
Cheers!
“The discovery of rapid eye movement (REM) sleep, a mentally active period during which dreaming occurs, provided a biological explanation for this phenomenon. It also inspired interest in sleep research by giving scientists a marker for changes in the brain during sleep. From this knowledge, they have begun to understand and develop treatments for major sleep disorders such as insomnia and sleep apnea. Everyone sleeps. This fundamental activity consumes one-third of our lifetimes and can overpower all other needs. But what does sleep do for us? What happens when you are sleep deprived? What are sleep disorders?
Much of what is known about sleep stems from the groundbreaking 1953 discovery of rapid eye movement (REM) sleep. This is an active period of sleep marked in humans by intense activity in the brain and rapid bursts of eye movements. At the same time, scientists discovered that REM sleep is when dreaming occurs.
Before the 1950s, most scientists thought of sleep as an unchanging, dormant period of little interest. Hardly anything was known about sleep or dreaming.”
read the rest here
«As I lay in my bed slepe full unmete
Was unto me, but why that I ne might
Rest I ne wist, for there n’as erthly wight
[As I suppose] had more of hertis ese
Than I, for I n’ad sicknesse nor disese.»
CHAUCER.
Well, maybe it WAS the alcohol because I was not dizzy all day and only had 2 glasses of wine last night and no hard alcohol. Am I just more sensitive to it now that I weigh less? That kind-of sucks.
No great dreams to report, just a decent night’s sleep and not so terribly tired today. It also helps to get to bed at a reasonable hour so I’m not trying to get by on 5 hours sleep. I’ve always needed more like 10. Wow.
Later…
Well after another night of no cpap, I woke up this morning feeling so dizzy I could barely think. Not much alcohol last night, so that can’t be it. I went to Jack and bought two meaty breakfast burritos to see if raising the blood-sugar would help. It did a little.
And the dreams last night sucked; so many about being sued by people who I ran into with my car. I was taking my lawyer through our house, which seemed to be a large whitewashed, Parisian number with high ceilings and a labyrinth of rooms. I one of those rooms I had apparently hid the dismembered corpse of Jesus Christ. This was apparently worth a great amount of money as my lawyer felt we should hide it and wait until the case was settled to auction it off. 1 million dollars seemed to be the best guess for the value of the corpse.
The rest of the house was filled with antiques; grandfather clocks, bureaus, sofas etc. It was just a night full of anxiety and sweat. Maybe just not enough alcohol;-)
Another strange day. I’ve cleaned my cpap and it’s ready for tonight. I’ve recanted my denunciation of cpap technology and am going to give it a try, even though J. says I am not snoring anymore. I still feel tired all day, and I don’t think it is because I sit in front of a computer screen all day long.
I am tired of being tired, as the saying goes, and I will do anything to stop feeling this way. I know it is possible that by starting and stopping all the time, I may be sabotaging my own success, but I cannot do it any other way.
Here’s hoping…
